Is everyone burnt out on talking about burnout (or, more specifically, âmillennial burnoutâ) yet? TBH, the thing thatâs got me the most fucked up about this conversation is that I didnât consult the Canadian Press Style Guide or whatever before creating my âburn outâ assets. The fact that this newsletterâs title is grammatically incorrect (âburn outâ is a verb) will haunt me forever. đ©đ©đ©đ©
(honestly idk i just found this when i googled âburnout memeâ)
Iâm not trying to be derisive; this newsletter literally takes its name after this affliction! To be very real, I guess Iâm just feeling a little defensive, maybe bracing myself for the eye-rolling that often follows an idea or object being trend-pieced tf out. I hope youâll stick with me!
Moving on: Iâve been spending my days in development for a pop music docu-series that youâll be able to see on Netflix (đ) and Crave (đšđŠ) in the future. Weâre starting writing this week. Iâm excited about the challenge of working in a different medium but, because Iâm in burnout recovery, Iâm still having a hard time focusing on doing one thing. Over the last six months Iâve had to learn to create boundaries around work, as well as my personal life â but especially around my ego, which was making too many decisions that wouldâve been better handled by head and heart. I like what Thebe said about this tendency and/or expectation that we go full-throttle in our perceived roles for the sake of the algorithm: âThe deification actually works in total opposition to what Iâm trying to do, which is to humanize the situation,â he says. âOne thing I know for sure is I want to be normalized. Iâm here, n-gga ânot in a chest-thumping way, but as in, Iâm here with yâall on Earth.â
I canât tell you how much that sentiment, and the rest of the interview, moved me. It makes me feel tactile and grounded, just like the bare plea in Robynâs âHuman Being.â Why are we wasting so much energy feeling anything less than human?
Did this get a little intense? Sorry, Iâve become obsessed with Tara Brach since summer. Burning out definitely turned me into a little bit of a woo-woo bitch!!! Let me close by sharing a few links that feel more instructive on this topic beyond the rawness of feeling:
On an episode of her new âmicropod,â Mary HK Choi referenced this phrase that the writer and novelist Alexander Chee (whose 2017 collection of essays How To Write An Autobiographical Novel was a big fav) used in an interview about process and working on one thing at a time: âthe monogamy of an idea.â I love this thought, as well as how Mary furthered the analogy by exploring the temptation and instant gratification that comes when we detour into another âsparkly newâ idea, after staring at one thing for so long.
If you're not into monogamy as praxis then here's another way of looking at it, via one of my favourite websites, The Creative Independent: world-building. âYou have to think about what youâre doing as creating your own worldâand then totally believing in it," says the musician Juan Mendez. âThatâs the best way to get anything done. What are other people people doing? Who cares? You donât care. Because what youâre doing matters the most to you. And you just keep going.â
Lastly, a plea to check in with yourself because, âPersonal productivityâŠserves the same psychological role that busyness has always served: to keep us sufficiently distracted that we donât have to ask ourselves potentially terrifying questions about how we are spending our days.â
Talk soon â
Anupa
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âïž Duncanâs newsletter about very human saints, heaven 24/7
đ°A beautiful way to give back: Vivek Shrayaâs new $5k grant for a BIPOC Canadian musician, between the ages of 18-28, to record their first EP.